Well I think if you’re married this can always happen, but I came across a blog post that really made me think about my actions towards my husband.
This is the BLOG if you would like to get inspired. She talks about her previous marriage and how she treated her husband. Nagging about little things and getting upset with him all the time. Her main issue was laundry being left on their bedroom floor day after day. Then one day her husband dies, and she is doing the last load of laundry from what he left on the floor. She looks back thinking, was the time I spent with him worth fighting over? “The reality is, I wasn’t helping him or our marriage. By pointing out each fault, I was poisoning the relationship. Oh, it was still a good marriage and we deeply loved each other, but it was not what it could have been. And now it was too late.”
For the most part, us as women love to point out what we think is wrong. We “think” we know the solution to everything and love to tell people how to just fix it.
At my church married couples would get together to talk about our struggles and our relationship with God once a week. Well the women would split off from the men every once in awhile to have “deeper convo” (or some bologna like that). You could ask my husband, I DREADED doing it, it was literally a husband haters club. I would walk out of there feeling like trash because of the things that would come up.
Don’t get me wrong, he pisses me off. But this verse always comes into my head, “Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.” Proverbs 21:9. Yes this is a real verse.
A marriage is suppose to be the living example on earth of God’s love. Do you see your husband in the same way God sees him? Do you show him love more than hate? When was the last time you prayed for him?
I really do ask myself if I have told him thank you for supporting us as a family lately. I still say thank you whenever he does something. And would you know it, he says thank you back and still opens the car door for me.
I haven’t been married for 40 years and don’t know the secrets of the trade, but we try. I think that is the thing, just try to love your husband even when you have cleaned up his dirty clothes, washed his dishes, and stared at the overflowing trash for two days. When I feel like he isn’t trying or my love tank is running on low (5 love languages), I tell him. I don’t do things in a passive aggressive way, I literally tell him I don’t feel like you’re loving me or that you’re doing all that you can. He understands because it really came from a loving heart. His loving heart quote to me when I am on a rant is “get over it”. Sounds harsh to most but he’s a simple man and I know what he means.
I am not trying to put down any women and I know being a loving wife and mother is a hard job. But I hope this encourages you to just step back and try loving your husband instead of trying to fix what he is doing wrong.
“Do to others as you would have them do to you.” – Luke 6:31